How are you?
This a question people ask every single day. But in all honesty when we ask do we really want to know the true answer or is it just a a formality???.
I just started working in my office Tuesday so this morning at 8:30 walking to work I saw a coworker and said "good morning how are you?" I was expecting a good and you then I'd say fine and we'd keep it moving. But no. She went on to tell me how she was tired because her son's father came over her house at one this morning because his no good girlfriend kicked him out and he had no place to go. So she let him in even though she hates him, because he is her child's father and all and next thing you know they were (insert X-rated info).... now mind you I met her Tuesday. A "tired but fine" would have really sufficed lol.
I should have learned from the first experience not to ask but I didn't think it would happen twice in one day.
A few minutes ago I was on AOL and got an IM from this guy I know. This time he initiated the how are you (probably because he knew I'd respond with the fine and you) so that's what I said then he hit me with the... I got evicted from my apartment and someone stole my new dog because they set him outside with my stuff. Then yesterday my car got a flat, so it's been awful. What do you say to that.
They both messed up the rotation. Don't they know it goes like this:
a: how are you?
b: I'm doing good and you?
a: I'm doing good as well
b: well that's good
Then you continue on with a convo or depart ways. All this actually telling how we are throws a loop into the pattern.
Don't they know most people really don't care how we are feeling, or if they really do care they prefer not to know. To know might carry with it some sense of responsibility. It's pretty much embedded in our mind to say "I'm ok" "doing good" or "I'm fine." For the most part the question is perfunctory, as is the response.
So be careful when you ask that question. I mean all we are doing is going through the motions. We actually don't want people to know how we really feel, right?
hmmmm
I just started working in my office Tuesday so this morning at 8:30 walking to work I saw a coworker and said "good morning how are you?" I was expecting a good and you then I'd say fine and we'd keep it moving. But no. She went on to tell me how she was tired because her son's father came over her house at one this morning because his no good girlfriend kicked him out and he had no place to go. So she let him in even though she hates him, because he is her child's father and all and next thing you know they were (insert X-rated info).... now mind you I met her Tuesday. A "tired but fine" would have really sufficed lol.
I should have learned from the first experience not to ask but I didn't think it would happen twice in one day.
A few minutes ago I was on AOL and got an IM from this guy I know. This time he initiated the how are you (probably because he knew I'd respond with the fine and you) so that's what I said then he hit me with the... I got evicted from my apartment and someone stole my new dog because they set him outside with my stuff. Then yesterday my car got a flat, so it's been awful. What do you say to that.
They both messed up the rotation. Don't they know it goes like this:
a: how are you?
b: I'm doing good and you?
a: I'm doing good as well
b: well that's good
Then you continue on with a convo or depart ways. All this actually telling how we are throws a loop into the pattern.
Don't they know most people really don't care how we are feeling, or if they really do care they prefer not to know. To know might carry with it some sense of responsibility. It's pretty much embedded in our mind to say "I'm ok" "doing good" or "I'm fine." For the most part the question is perfunctory, as is the response.
So be careful when you ask that question. I mean all we are doing is going through the motions. We actually don't want people to know how we really feel, right?
hmmmm
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